Wherever the path may lead us
by Eriathalia
Summary: Qui-Gon Jinn survives the events of Episode I. He and Obi-Wan decide to raise Anakin despite the councils orders. Obi-Wan starts feeling replace by the boy, but will soon learn that his hidden feelings towards his master are actually returned. [AU]
1. Chapter 1

He will never forget the heart-wrenching seconds in which time seemed to freeze, that moment when the Sith's double edged saber pierced his master's chest. That instant Obi-Wan had thought he'd lose his master forever. He wanted to break through the forcefield, launch himself at the fiend and pay him back for the loss. But he was trapped, unable to reach him, at least for the moment.

It is later that he holds the weakening body of his master, his friend and mentor, in his arms, seeing the light in his eyes fading slowly. If only he were more experienced. He could heal him. He wants to so desperately.

Obi-Wan denies the inevitable, is not prepared to give up. He doesn't want to give up. As he feels a cooling hand touch his cheek, he breaks, face crunching up in desperation and tears slipping down his cheeks.

"No. Don't leave me master. Please" He is begging, pleading and praying to whatever higher entity may listen, to show him a way to save him.

He covers the hand on his cheek with his own, holding it in place.

"Master! Don't go! Hold on. You're stronger than this. You can pull through. Please. Please..." His head sinks to the other man's chest. There still is a heartbeat but it's weakening steadily. He concentrates, wills this heart to keep on beating, wills the fatal wound to close, believes with all his might that it is not futile. And there it is, a thump and then another, weak but steady. When he looks up the others eyes are closed, but the rise and fall of his chest indicates he is alive.

Later, he will only remember it all in a blur. The way he picked up Qui Gon, carried him back to their ship and how his sat by his bedside, waiting and hoping for him to wake up...

Obi-Wan had taken in the boy as well, just as he had promised. He felt bad for not being the support to him he was supposed to be. Instead Ani would watch him sadly as he sat slumped over, eyes red from lack of sleep and occasional tears. He was a bright kid and far more compassionate than Obi-Wan had thought possible. Sometimes he would sit with him, sometimes curl up in his lap, silently watching the sleeping man on the cot. His guardian would fold him into his cloak, rest his chin on top of his head. He could sense the child was missing the older Jedi as well. Even in the short time they had spent together a bond had formed. He knew better than to question it. The Force had its ways and he was aware the motives would often remain shrouded in shadows. The outcome felt right all the same.

Sometimes the boy falls asleep in his position curled up against his chest. Obi-Wan tends to keep on cradling him, feeling the need to replace the mother the boy had lost back on Tatooine. It might not be the way of a Jedi, but to him it was the right way. It gives him a sense of family. He likes it, warm and comforting and more than he ever thought he needed until he felt it for the first time.

The moment his master opens his eyes and smiles at them, weak but reassuring, he cannot help but smile back, heart overflowing with happiness. There's something else as well. It will take him a long time to figure it out.


	2. Chapter 2

The road to recovery is a tedious one. It takes weeks for his master to walk for more than a few paces at a time. Throughout it all Obi-Wan barely ever leaves his side. He will be the first Qui-Gon sees upon waking and the last before fatigue takes over, sending him back into a slumber.

It is not always a peaceful one. At times he will twitch, move in his sleep or try to fight off imaginary fiends. They have his light-saber removed from the room after he calls for it the third night around, almost beheading young Anakin, who was watching his friends sleep anxiously.

Often, Obi-Wan will struggle with strange feelings taking hold of him whenever his mentor is tossing and turning on his medbed. He wants to stop it, help the other to regain his peace. Only he doesn't know how. Many times he catches himself with the desire to simply reach out and hold him till the nightmare retreats and sets him free once more. He buries these thoughts in the deepest corners of his mind. It is unacceptable to nurture them, even if they fill him with a warmth and comfort unknown to him before.

So he keeps on sitting, watching him, waiting for the dreams to pass, motionless, powerless. And in some way it pains him. Still he knows that overstepping his boundaries would hurt him even worse.

Anakin on the other hand has grown weary of the older Jedi. As long as he is awake the boy will smile and tell him about the progress he's made with the protocol droid or another of his projects. Sometimes he will even read to him. The child is proud of learning fast and eager to put it on display. While Qui-Gon will silently indulge him, granting him a few measured smiles as a reward, Obi-Wan keeps on watching them from afar. Even though they do not look alike, there is an air around them, which he imagines only father and son possess. He wishes to be part of it but feels like an intruder. Thus he remains distant, merely returning their smiles should they ever turn their gaze his way.

The days soon fall I to a comfortable routine. A simple meal followed by walks which are getting longer day by day, meditating and keeping the kid out of trouble. He is pleased to see his friends health improving fast at this point. If Obi-Wan is honest he misses the adventures their lives in service of the Jedi order provided them with regularly. It is not that he likes war-but he cannot imagine being stuck in this kind of domestic life forever. But for now he is content, at least on the outside, for with his master's health progressing, there is no need for him to watch over his mentor any longer.

Instead the nights find him in his own tiny room, meditating to purge the thoughts of longing from his mind. They have grown stronger, providing him with flashes of memory, always showing him one man alone, long hair, clear blue eyes, a soft smile. But no! He cannot show these feelings, cannot fall prey to them. It is against any code.

As time flies by, he more and more retreats to the shadows. He knew from the beginning that they were bound to raise the boy as a new Jedi apprentice. But the way Obi-Wan feels replaced and betrayed by the child is hard to overcome. Once it was him Jinn's attention was directed at. They would chat, train, fulfill their missions and in that become an inseparable team. To him these times were precious. Secretly, he had hoped it could last forever.

Now he gladly takes the few crumbs of affection that are granted to him, stores them away in his memory. It is all too clear they will come to haunt him once he is sent back to his quarters, yet they are all he has to keep him company in the night, all that is left over from the old times.

Jealousy is not a trait any Jedi should allow to become dominant and guide his actions. And still he is on the verge of giving in to it. If only he was allowed to be part of what the boy has now. Is it asking too much to retain a piece of his friends time and fondness?

In the eyes of the others he doesn't betray any of these thoughts, going on his routine, whether he is allowed to be part of theirs or training on his own. And isn't it a twist of fate that Anakin would come to him, tell him of all his former master has taught him, hoping for a little praise? The boy doesn't know how his actions drive the knife deeper through his heart, the smile so innocent and pure. He still falls asleep in Obi-Wan lap at times, tired from the strenuous lessons and he cannot bring himself to turn the child away. So he keeps on holding him, faking a smile and praying that there is a higher cause that will ultimately turn the tide once more, bringing back together what was separated by fate.

Little does he know that his own hurt has made him blind to longing blue eyes watching him from afar.


	3. Chapter 3

There's something strange about his padawan these days, though Qui-Gon isn't able to put his finger on what exactly seems wrong. Almost does he want to be proud that Obi-Wan has learned to shield his thoughts and emotions so well, just like a true master. But it leaves him with the problem at hand: the one he cares for far more than he'd like-or rather dare-to admit is drawing back from him more and more.

During the time he was mostly bound to his bed, patiently waiting for his body to recuperate, the younger man had barely left his side. Even though he kept it a secret, Qui-Gon was pleased to have gained his full attention. The other wasn't aware of it, but many a night his master would wake from another nightmare and find his padawan fast asleep, head resting on the bed near his pillow.

Sometimes he would take a hold of the hand spread across the corner of his blanket, other times even allow himself the comfort of stroking the soft ginger hair. Of course the younger one wouldn't know, come morning. Jinn is careful to make sure of it. It is also why he's dreading his recovery just as much as he's longing for it. Jinn is certain that, once he is stable enough to not give off any more reason to be watched at night, these precious moments will come to an end. Only he doesn't want them to.

Nevertheless he cannot delay the inevitable forever. Too soon is he able to take lengthy walks again, move freely and without pain, even if his body still remains weaker than it used to be before the attack. And just as he had feared the day, when his friend is silently retreating back to his own quarters, comes soon enough.

In its wake follows the shift in his padawan's behavior. Subtle changes at the beginning quickly become patterns of avoidance. Qui-Gon is unable to confront him, as his new protégé is demanding steadily growing parts of his time. He misses their easy conversations, their adventures and even the days spent in companionable silence. They have become part of his life, just as important as breathing. He can't bear to think of losing it all.

Ever since the Jedi had found him on the desolate planet of Tatooine, Anakin's attachment to him has grown. The boy had started reading to him early in his recovery, showed him pieces of new technological projects or went on about all the things unknown to him up to this point. Qui-Gon would smile silently and sometimes speak words of praise. They made the boy so happy. He could see it in the way the child's eyes would light up and shine with pride about his accomplishments.

Every so often the boy did climb into his lap and rest his head against Jinn's chest in a manner of seeking the most basic comfort. The Jedi's arms would then fold around him, holding him safe and rarely he would even kiss the kids forehead in a display of fatherly affection.

It is exactly what he experiences, at least in some way. A father…

As a member of the Jedi order he has never imagined to know this feeling, as the code so clearly forbids them to build up a family of their own. And yet here he is, a small, blonde boy clinging to the front of his robes.

It is a dangerous game to play, but Jinn has never been known to abide the rules to the letter. Maybe his attachments will be his downfall one day. But as the code also states: be aware of the future, live in the presence. He decided to go with it long ago.

Nevertheless it is painful for Qui-Gon to observe how Anakin's affection towards him seems to directly influence his padawan's as well-in a negative way. The more the boy comes to love 'uncle Qui-Gon', the more Obi-Wan wanders off, pretends to be occupied by training. The older man can tell it is a lie, for when their eyes meet he can see a sadness in the younger one's gaze that hasn't been there before. He can tell the shared smiles are faked for the sake of peace, but he fears losing his friend-not to the dark side. To something worse.

Obi-Wan may not be aware of it, but as the years passed by he has become more than a simple apprentice to his master. Many would think his mentor's emotions inappropriate if they knew, and yet he has been unable to let go of them, even if acting on them was out of the question. Until now, that is.

Watching his friend from the corner of his eye, he can see a shadow once again creeping across his face, only being replaced by a strained smile once he fully turns his head. He longs to get up from where he is sat with Anakin clinging to him. And he longs to touch his face, embrace him and tell him it is going to be alright, that he is irreplaceable, that he has been loved for all these years.

Soon, he thinks and stays behind as Obi-Wan excuses himself once more.


	4. Chapter 4

Despite his best efforts it takes Qui-Gon two more weeks to finally catch his padawan alone. Often the boy Anakin would come running the exact moment he intends to speak up. On these occasions Obi-Wan would make a swift retreat, leaving them with only the vision of his billowing cloak. Even the child has picked up on his strange demeanor by now. Frequently he will ask him why 'uncle Obi' was running away from them.

Qui-Gon was at a loss about what to say and finally settles on "He is not running away my child. Obi-Wan takes his training very seriously. He wants to become a great Jedi knight."

It is a lie, but he doesn't want to hurt the boy.

"Doesn't he like us anymore?" It almost breaks his heart.

"No Ani, he just needs some time to himself"

"Will he come back?"

"Yes Anakin."In his mind he adds: I hope so.

Jinn doesn't see his friend again until late at night, long after he has put the boy to bed.

He is slumped in an armchair in their shared living quarters when he feels his presence, then sees the ginger haired man as he tries to sneak past him unnoticed.

"You are well aware that I can sense you in the Force, aren't you Obi-Wan? "

"Master." He bows in respect. "I wasn't aware you were still up."

Qui-Gon can hear insecurity in his voice for the fraction of a second before the younger Jedi gets a hold of himself.

"Weren't you?" Jinn frowns. "Or did you not _want_ to be?" He beckons the other closer with a wave of his hand. Obi-Wan obeys silently.

"Sit with me" He requests, his voice taking on an undertone of being an actual order.

"Yes Master." Carefully he sits down beside his mentor, making certain to maintain a respectful distance. He doesn't look at the older man. There's something telling him, that the upcoming conversation will be an unpleasant one. Who was he to fool himself all this time, thinking his master wouldn't notice?

Obi-Wan braces himself. He doesn't know how to answer, should the questioning take a direction invading his personal space. He dreads that it is bound to happen. The young Jedi is certain it will mean losing his last connection to what once was.

There's a long-lasting silence between them.

Finally, after several minutes of utter discomfort, Qui-Gon finds his voice.

"How have you been lately?" he inquires, keeping his tone calm and non-judgmental.

"Training proceeds well and I think my skills in the use of the Force have progressed further." Obi-Wan's voice is flat, his face not betraying any emotion.

Reaching out over their bond, once so strong and radiant, but now shriveled to a handful of tendrils, Jinn is quickly fended off by the barriers his padawan has built up so expertly.

If the other notices, he doesn't let it show.

"That's not what I meant" He's taking the plunge into deep waters. It is what he's been waiting for. Why stall the inevitable?

The other pretends to be oblivious and simply replies "What else did you ask then, master?" He knows too well, but everything inside him resists, clinging to the last pieces of the illusion that there's another way out.

Qui-Gon sighs. "You've become distant, padawan"

"Did I? You must be mistaken, master. Isn't it the task of a Jedi to steadily improve? You told me yourself: I have much yet to learn." He smiles, trying to conceal his inner turmoil.

"And that itself is laudable, but I worry about you"

"Worry, master?" The older man's words confuse him.

"Do you think it impossible I am, when I observe one of my closest friends withdrawing more and more?" He turns to face the younger one, his features serious, but his eyes remaining calm and caring.

"Should I not be alarmed that your smile is almost gone, that you will turn from me whenever our eyes meet? Shouldn't I question the conversion of an open-minded to a secluded man? You've changed, Obi-Wan, ever since my recovery was completed. I want to know why."

"You must be mistaken. There's nothing amiss, I assure you" Qui-Gon can hear the defiance in his voice, a shift in the force indicating the other is telling a lie once more. He sighs heavily.

"Is it the boy?" It is a blunt approach, but simple reason will not help him here.

"Whatever gave you that impression?" Obi-Wan crosses his arms.

There's a lot which remains unspoken, like the accusations forming in his mind, questions, demands on why that child is so much better than him. Still he cannot keep a slight trace of annoyance from his voice.

"That." Jinn raises an eyebrow, silently asking: isn't it obvious?

"Are you mocking me now? You're seeing things that aren't there. Your imagination only!" He stands abruptly, taking up a defensive stance.

"If you will excuse me? I think this is pointless" He turns to leave, but the other takes a hold of his wrist.

"Wait!" The younger man tries to pull away.

Qui-Gon gives his arm a tug, effectively setting him off balace. He catches him and there it is, a flicker of desperation and longing.

He decides to take the chance without further thinking "You are a fool Obi-Wan" And with that he brushes the younger man's lips with his own, gently, softly, conveying the inner core of his true feelings.

It is over as quick as it begun, the contact broken all too soon. Jinn waits. The other stares at him, eyes wide, shocked into immobility.

When the answer comes, it is nothing but a hoarse croak. "Why?"

And then he closes the distance again, crushes their mouths together without finesse, but filled with a storm of emotion powerful enough to destroy them both if not handled with care.

They part, eventually, the need for air forcing them to pause. Instead Qui-Gon's hand finds his padawan's cheek and brushes his thumb over the high cheekbone, the expression on his features showing nothing but tenderness and deep affection. And isn't the vision above him the most beautiful thing he as ever laid his eyes on?

"Look at you." The words are spoken barely above a whisper.

Obi-Wan can feel a blush creeping onto his face. He's never been subjected to such scrutiny before. Shyly he lowers his head and mumbles "Forgive me"

"There's nothing to forgive. Shh…" Qui-Gon's arms come up around his back, drawing him in against a muscular chest, one hand then tangling in his ginger tresses.

He clings to his master, face buried against the crook of the others neck as his carefully erected barriers crumble and make way for the raw emotions that had been bottled up inside.

"I thought the boy had taken my place." Jinn's heart aches at his friends words. Softly he kisses the top of his padawan's head.

"Never. You're irreplaceable to me"

There's a muffled sound and soon Qui-Gon can feel the collar of his robes drenched with tears. His hold tightens, the hand not yet occupied starting to trace the younger one's spine through the rough material of his tunic. When the sobs finally quieten they make way to an exhausted yet peaceful slumber.

Carefully, as not to waken the man in his arms, he picks him up and carries him to his quarters. After a moment's hesitation Qui-Gon curls up beside him, folding Obi-Wan into another embrace, and follows him into oblivion.


	5. Chapter 5

Obi-Wan wakes as the first rays of morning light hit his face. He yawns and stretches, causing the one behind him to emit a pained "Oof" as his elbow collides with their ribs. He freezes, then takes a look around.

He is _not_ in _his_ chamber, that much is certain.

While he himself tends to store away tokens, reminders of his and Qui-Gon's shared missions, all the happy memories, turning his quarters into a fairly messy place, this one is almost bare. There are only a few pieces of furniture, an exotic plant sprouting dozens of tiny white blossoms and some artifacts that must have come straight out of old Jedi temples. Besides that, there are books-actual old fashioned, leather bound tomes-stacked up on a shelf. It explains the strange scent, Obi-Wan thinks.

The form curled up against his back shifts, one arm coming up a round his midriff and drawing him back against the source of warmth. He has to admit, that the feeling is far from being unpleasant. Still he cannot remember how he ended up in this position. A lift of the blanket confirms, that his modesty, at least, is safe.

"You're thinking too much, Obi-Wan." The voice is familiar, albeit raspy with the remnants of sleep.

"Master?" He is aware of the sheer disbelief in his tone.

"Do you wish I was someone else?" The answer is teasing, a smile and a hint of laughter so clearly audible.

"No. I don't." he replies, then manages to change his position enough to catch a glimpse of the other's face. Qui-Gon's eyes are shining. His long hair is undone from its usual ponytail, spread freely across the pillow. And his smile-he has longed to see this, dreamed of affection beyond mere friendship and now here it is, staring right back at him.

"Master." He is breathless, words failing to come to him. It is insufficient, he knows, so far from what he _wants_ to express. Obi-Wan hopes the other will know it anyway.

Jinn relinquishes his hold for just a moment, allows his protégé to fully turn around, before tangling a hand in the soft red hair, the young man's braid playfully twirled around his forefinger.

Their eyes meet, linking their spirits together, the bond, which had weakened ever since Obi-Wan's withdrawal, coming back to life, so much more intense than before. It leaves them both gasping, the rush overwhelming and yet exhilarating.

"Is this a dream?" Reluctantly he raises a hand and runs it across his Qui-Gon's face, the beard scratchy under his palm.

"We both would be dreaming then" Jinn answers, and covers the hand with his own.

Obi-Wan closes his eyes, determined to will away the tears that threaten to build up behind his lashes. "I'm sorry, master"

Just as the evening before, Jinn draws him in, wraps him up in a cocoon of warmth and safety.

"You were right, my friend." His fingers start playing with the younger man's braid.

"With what, master?" He tries to look up, but his head is safely locked under the other's chin.

Qui-Gon huffs. "I don't think you calling me _master_ is appropriate anymore" he jests "At least not when we're alone."

"But you're -" Obi-Wan objects and is quickly cut off.

" _I_ confessed that you're far more than an apprentice to me" He pulls back and tilts the ginger's face up to meet his eyes.

"And I think I'm more than just a master to you as well" There's a questioning undertone, though his intense gaze reveals he already knows the truth.

"You are" Obi-Wan breathes out, the other's scrutiny giving him goosebumps all along his body. "You always have been"

Qui-Gon brushes a finger across the younger Jedi's soft lips, causing him to gasps, a rush of pleasure buzzing along their shared bond.

Jinn is amazed by the strong reaction even the smallest of caresses evokes. He revels in it, bathes his own spirit in the soft glow so unlike anything he has ever known of encounters from his youth.

"Kiss me" It is more a plea than a demand and he oblieges willingly.

It starts out slowly, small brushes of lips and repeated sighs. Over and over they meet, softness giving way to passion as Obi-Wan opens his mouth, granting Jinn's tongue entrance, the sensation making both of them hum in pleasure. Their hands keep on wandering, searching, desperately holding on to hair and robes, touching soft skin, leaving them breathless when they finally have to part in need of air, their faces flushed and lips swollen.

"I love you" It is uttered between pants and all Qui-Gon can do is lean in again, gently nipping at his padawan's bottom lip, then engaging him in another tender kiss that seems to go on eternally. It is all the confirmation Obi-Wan needs.

"Will you allow me to stay?" he mutters.

"I will not allow you to leave." The younger man nods. "I don't want to."

"Good." He shifts so the younger one's head is resting in the crook of his neck, one arm safely draped across his back.

After a few moments of silence Qui-Gon speaks up. "Anakin was worried about you."

Obi-Wan sighs "I gave him plenty of reason to. Maybe I should apologize." He can feel his friends hand rubbing his back reassuringly.

"The boy is very forgiving. He'll be happy to have his companion back"

"I thought you wouldn't want me close anymore, given you now have the boy to train." he answers, regret evident in every word.

"Anakin is like a son to me. You on the other hand…" he trails off, but the meaning is obvious now.

"I didn't see. I was a fool." He smiles against Qui-Gon's chest.

"I won't deny that" Obi-Wan huffs quietly, his breath tickling the other's neck

"Charming."

"Would you have it any other way?"

The redhead grins. "No, not at all"


	6. Chapter 6

They have fallen into a comfortable silence, so unlike the one driving them apart before. And yet it says so much at the same time. It confirms, that their hope of finding these feelings shunned by the order are returned, that the trust between them remains unbroken, that there is some resemblance of a family-even for those never expecting to find it. And it speaks of the deep feelings of love they bear for each other.

The silence is suddenly broken by a blonde head popping up from beside Qui-Gon's bed, wide blue eyes staring at them.

"What are you doing uncle Qui?" The boy's face shows nothing but an innocent curiosity.

Almost does Obi-Wan laugh at the use of the abbreviation. He admits it has a cute sound to it, albeit it is not really befitting the powerful Jedi master he has come to know and ultimately love. That circumstance alone makes it all the more endearing.

Anakin's eyes fix on him next, his face lighting up instantly "UNCLE WAN!" The impact of the boy flinging his tiny frame on top of him makes Obi-Wan gasp for air as he is caught in the tightest embrace he has ever known.

"Easy Ani" He wheezes.

The grip doesn't subside, instead growing even tighter-if it is humanly possible at all.

He looks at Qui-Gon for help, but the other is merely laughing silently, eyes shining with mirth and shoulders shaking ever so slightly.

*I told you Ani missed you a lot, padawan* He can only hear the older man's voice in his mind, a proof how strong their bond really has become.

*Where has my stern master gone?* He rolls his eyes and looks at his mentor.

*I think that one's still asleep. I enjoy this sight way too much* It is followed by another quiet chuckle.

*Traitor!* Obi-Wan sticks out his tongue in a childish gesture. It only makes the older Jedi shake his head, giving him a 'Your own fault for making the boy miss you so much. Deal with it.' look.

With a huff the ginger turns his attention back to the child now curled up on his chest, blissfully oblivious to his friends' conversation.

"I missed you, Wan" He can feel Anakin's hands tightening in his robes as if to make sure he doesn't vanish again. It almost breaks Obi-Wan's heart.

"I missed you too." And despite his former feelings of jealousy he knows it to be true.

"Where have you been?" The boy asks.

"I-" He hesitates, not sure how to answer the innocent question

"I needed to train. A special kind of training neither your uncle Qui," That earns him a glare, but it barely covers the amusement beneath "nor you could have helped me with."

"Will you stay with us now? Uncle Qui was very sad." He can feel another sting in his heart. He had been too blind to see, mind clouded by the void of seemingly being abandoned. Next to him he can hear his master wince.

"Of course I will" He runs a hand through the soft blonde hair, now cut short with only a slim braid behind his right ear left.

Anakin lifts his head and smiles, then squeezes him again, as tight as his short arms will allow.

"I see master Qui-Gon has had your hair cut" The boy bears so much resemblance to himself in his younger years now.

"Yes!" Ani answers, full of excitement. "I'm going to be a Jedi! Just like you Wan!"

"Does that make you happy?" He ruffles the spiky hair and raises a questioning eyebrow.

"Yes, yes, yes!" The boy is practically buzzing with energy.

"Come on!" He jumps out of bed, accidentally kicking Obi-Wan's ribs in the process, and yanks his arm.

"Ow!" The ginger groans and stretches "Now?"

"Of course, silly! I need to show you something! Get." Another yank "Up!"

Sighing, Obi-Wan gives in to his fate and sits up.

*Forgive me ma-* His words break off as he notes the other is curled in on himself, heavily shaking with barely contained laughter.

*I'll need to have a word with you later* The answer is a wave of hand, effectively telling him to 'Go alread!'

Emitting one last sigh, the younger man raises for good and follows the bundle of energy still tugging at his sleeve.

Qui-Gon remains, watching them leave, before wiping a tear from his eyes and taking a few deep breaths to finally calm down from his laughing fit. He can't remember the last time he allowed himself to laugh freely like this. It must have been a time long before he joined the Jedi order. Indeed, the feelings in his heart are unfamiliar to him, but of such a nature that he wouldn't want to miss out on them for even another second.

It takes him a few more moments to get up as well, setting out to prepare a simple meal for whenever his two younger fellows will return to him.


	7. Chapter 7

The boy is so full of energy, dragging him along long hallways, laughing and chatting away.

Only now does Obi-Wan realize how much he missed it-not only being close to his master and secret love, but also Anakin's gentle and always happy nature, the wide eyes he sees the world with and the way every single detail holds a fascination to him, which he is eager to examine.

And there is the boy's extraordinary talent. A talent that should be handled well, nurtured and given the chance to prosper.

"Look uncle Wan!" They have reached some kind of workshop, littered with spare parts, heaps of tangled wires, magnifying glasses and other tools. If he didn't know the sheer genius of the short, blonde child tugging at his hand insistently, Obi-Wan would have sworn it was the workplace of an old scientist or mechanic.

"Come on, come on!" Ani drags the older man over to a corner. "Remember 3PO?"

Obi-Wan shakes his head. "I don't think I've seen him before."

"Oh right, uncle Qui was the one who met him! Ah well…" He goes on babbling about the protocol droid and all the work he put into a bunch of half rotten wires and metal plates to rebuild him.

Obi-Wan eyes the golden droid and is a little startled as it comes to life.

"Good, isn't he?" The boy crosses his arms, looking both smug and proud.

"Master Anakin! So good to see you!" The droid bows to his master, then turns "And who are you? So pleased to see young master Anakin has found another friend. Oh, I need to find R2. Where is that little droid now? Didn't stay with me. I need to have a word with him" 3PO stalks off, the stream of words never ceasing.

"He's a little on the talkative side. Speaks several thousand languages" Ani shrugs.

"Impressive." Obi-Wan smiles. "Did you bring him here from Tatooine?"

"Yup." The blonde jumps up on his workbench and sits on the edge, letting his legs dangle over the side.

"I missed you" They boy's eyes are sad. He had said it before, but with only the two of them and no other bearing witness to the emotions he so expertly tried to repress, it sounds even more broken. It hits Obi-Wan's heart like an arrow.

"I'm sorry Ani" He steps up to the kid and places a hand on his shoulder. There's a deep need to comfort the sad child building up inside him, but he's lacking experience himself. It is something training as a Jedi does not include. His own withdrawal certainly was proof of it.

In the next second a weight hits his chest as Anakin hugs him as tight as his short arms will allow.

At a loss for what to do Obi-Wan runs a hand through his hair, trying to soothe the boy, who by now is sobbing miserably, the dams finally breaking, making way for a wave of emotions crashing down on him.

"Shh Ani. Everything is alright now"

"Stay Wan. I don't want you to leave again. And neither does uncle Qui. He was crying. I saw it, even if uncle Qui would never show it."

The ginger is taken aback, the true damage he had done only now sinking in.

"I was a dumb man Ani. I'm sorry."

"Do you love me Wan?" The boy looks up from blurry eyes.

"'Course I do" He ruffles Ani's hair.

"I love you too." The kid relaxes gradually, sobs slowly subsiding.

"Uncle Qui loves you very much too." Leaning up he whispers into Obi-Wan's ear "Like a papa loves a mama. I think he wants to be with you. Just like this morning"

The older one flushes at that, knowing it to be true, but not expecting the blunt statement of the child still nestled against his chest.

"Are you going to be my momma now?" The blonde's eyes are wide, curious and a little hopeful.

"I ah…" Obi-Wan doesn't know what to say, the concept both strange and surprising, but also not as unlikely as he would have once thought. He clears his throat. "Is that what you want?"

It is answered with vigorous nodding "And Uncle Qui can be my dad. I never had a dad before. Do you think he wants to be my dad? Can we be a real family?" The words break out of the boys mouth in a relentless stream.

"I...I...why...don't we ask him?"

"Now?" The excitement is back, the child's eyes still red from crying, but a wide smile on his face.

Obi-Wan sighs. "I guess so." It leaves a tingling feeling in his stomach. Examining his own thoughts carefully he comes to the conclusion that, indeed, he would gladly and wholeheartedly agree. The boy truly is a wonder, his brilliance only rivaled by his innocence and naivety. A special child for certain. He smiles down warmly as the boy once more takes hold of his hand.

Again he is dragged along the long corridors, silently giving in to his fate as they make their way back.


	8. Chapter 8

The scent of breakfast greets Obi-Wan and his young protégé as they arrive back to their lodgings. The boy dashes into the room, calling out for the older Jedi, his youthful energy barely contained.

"Uncle Qui! Where are you uncle Qui?!"

His face comes into view around a corner, a wide smile tugging at the corners of his lips. Ani pounces at him, almost throwing him off balance. Qui-Gon ruffles his hair affectionately, then picks him up.

"Hello Ani. Did you manage to show our young friend your achievements?" he asks.

"Yup! I need to tell you something too!"

"Ani, wait!" Obi-Wan bites his lip, face already flushed by the shame anticipated to come.

The boy leans in and whispers into Qui-Gon's ear "Uncle Obi said we could be a real family…" He smiles shyly.

"Oh…" The younger man can see his friend's face turning a bright shade of red as well.

"Uh…" The ginger rubs his neck sheepishly "More like he asked me. I ah…"

Qui-Gon chuckles "Well...do you want this?" It is first answered by Ani nodding enthusiastically.

"Do you?" Obi-Wan murmurs, seeking out Jinn's eyes and holding the gaze with his own.

"I…" It takes a moment for him to bring up the courage to answer "I do"

"Now kiss!" Ani exclaims, making both of them duck their heads in embarassment. The boy huffs. "You are so silly. Didn't you sleep with each other last night?"

It costs all of Qui-Gon's self-control to not drop the boy in shock, while Obi-Wan tries to fend off an impromptu coughing fit.

"That was not-!"

Anakin cuts him off "But I saw you. You were cuddling Qui." He turns his face to the man holding him "Do you not like Obi? I know he really likes you. It would be so sad"

Jinn sets the boy down carefully, fixing him with a stern glance, but the child only remarks "Am I not right? Are you mad now?" He shuffles his feet.

"No, my boy" the Jedi master says. But you caught me off guard.

"What does that mean?" Ani tilts his head to the side. "Is it a riddle?"

"No." Qui-Gon runs a hand through the wild, blonde hair. "It means you surprised me."

"How so?" the kid protests " Everyone can see how much you like Obi. And I know he likes you too. He told me!" Anakin repeats decidedly, adding a short nod for good measure. "It's not that difficult!" the blonde chastises him, as if he were a child himself, so very slow on the uptake. "If someone loves another, are they not supposed to kiss?" The boy's expression is serious.

"Mostly yes, my boy."

"Don't you love Obi, uncle Qui?" His eyes are wide and questioning.

"I…" Qui-Gon throws Obi-Wan a desperate glance, but the other is too caught up in his own embarrassment.

"I...do like him a lot…" The older man lowers his head, hair cascading around his face, effectively hiding his features.

"YOU'RE BLUSHING!" The boy blurts out. Qui-Gon stiffens.

"That's…" He sighs. "Anakin, would you give us a moment?" He clears his throat.

"Sure!" The kid replies and sits down right where he is, legs crossed. "Will you kiss _now_?" He looks up, eyes wide and grinning from one ear to the other.

Obi-Wan has to stifle another coughing fit, his face burning, everything in him screaming flight. "Anakin…" He somehow manages to get his bearings together "I don't think that's what he meant".

The boy tilts his head to the side. "Then what was it? Are you shy uncle Obi?"

"N-No!" The ginger protests. "Just...go play with some power converters?" He hopes the boy will pick up on the pleading for some privacy in his voice.

"Aaaalriiiight." Ani shrugs and gets up. "See you in a bit." With another huge grin he takes off, closing the door behind him, but actually standing on his tiptoes outside to watch them through the old fashioned keyhole.

Obi-Wan leans back against an armchair, arms crossed and his face slowly returning to its usual pale color.

"That didn't go too well…" His remarks is met by a raised eyebrow.

"Why do you think so? He seems accepting enough" Qui-Gon paces the room, finally coming to a stop behind the younger one.

"Overly eager and excited, I woul say." He turns to face the other.

"And that is a bad thing to you? Having him love you like a father, trust you like real family, unconditionally?"

Obi-Wan lowers his head in defeat. "Are you not overwhelmed?" he murmurs "The code-"

Jinn's fingers on his lips cut him off.

"The code would tell you to bury what we just found, give up all affection we bear each other. Is that what you desire?"

Obi-Wan shakes his head. "No. It would break my heart to lose you."

"Then what difference does the love of this child make? We _can_ raise him together. He is special, we both know that. Isn't this a great opportunity to…"

"To what?" The younger man's hand catches the other one currently tracing his cheek, squeezing it gently.

"To create a future for all of us. It's in our hands. Are we not supposed to be compassionate as well? What better chance to teach him? And what better chance for us to be together?" Qui-Gon's voice is barely above a whisper by now, lips almost brushing Obi-Wan's.

"You're right." The ginger closes both his eyes and the distance between them, engaging his master, turned partner, into a gentle kiss.

It is only broken when they hear a littering sound behind them, followed by a mixture of pained grunts and the still cheerful laughter of a child, currently getting up from where he had fallen through the door after leaning too heavy on the handle.


	9. Chapter 9

"Anakin" both men exclaim simultaneously upon seeing him looking up from the ground, Qui-Gon immediately falling to his knees to check the boy over for injuries.

"What were you thinking?" He turns the kid around once.

The blonde only giggles and answers "I was right! You do love daddy Obi!"

Obi-Wan gasps, his eyes widening at the implication. Upon seeing his reaction Ani tilts his head to the side.

"Do you not want to be my dad?" His eyes look sad. "And you daddy Qui?"

The older man hesitates and looks up, locking his gaze with Obi-Wan's, questioning. After a few more moments the ginger nods and smiles gently, slowly kneeling as well and holding out his arms. The boy contemplates him, utterly confused

"Come on Ani!" He winks, beckoning the child to come closer.

The force with which he tacklehugs Obi-Wan almost throws the ginger off balance as too short arms come up around his neck, holding on tightly as the older one picks him up.

"You're very strong" Ani murmurs against his chest.

"So will you be one day." He ruffles the boy's hair, mindful of not accidentally dropping him.

Qui-Gon joins them in the middle of the room. "Mind if I join in?" He sounds almost shy, asking this.

Despite his defiant nature towards certain rules of the Jedi order, being open about his emotions like this feels strange. Disagreeing with not having any attachments was one side, actually expressing affection, no matter how deeply he has felt it for a long time, another.

"Yes!" Ani grins and stretches out one arm. "Come here Qui! Come here!"

He laughs and draws both of them into a tight embrace.

The sensation is strange, as if his heart was swelling in his chest. Until this day he had been unaware, that this was even possible.

"We should take care of breakfast" He mumbles "Before it turns completely cold"

"Yes!" Ani exclaims once again and struggles in Obi-Wan's arms. "Let me down Obi?"

"Alright, alright" The ginger sets him down, laughing as the kid rushes off to get the best bits of breakfast. Obi-Wan cannot begrudge it, knowing so well, that the child had lead a life of many privations in the past.

"Will the chef grant us the privilege of joining us?" The younger man raises an eyebrow and grins.

Jinn leans down and pecks his cheek. "You bet I will, padawan"

"No longer your Padawan!" Obi-Wan protests, cheeks flushed a light pink as he touches the spot his friend had kissed.

Qui-Gon, already in the process of following Anakin, turns back around. "We will see. By the way, you need a shave" He winks and follows their protégé.

"And if I want to keep the beard?" The ginger shouts and follows him quickly.

"Maybe, my friend, maybe."

Sitting down at the table, Jinn crosses his arms and watches his little family-he isn't sure where the thought comes from, but it feels right to think this way- as they devour their meal like hungry wolves. The eagerness with which even his partner finishes off his breakfast makes him wonder if the other ate at all during the time of their misunderstanding. Inwardly he feels a slight anger rising up, not towards Obi-Wan, but his own inability to see his young friend's suffering earlier. He sighs. There is no time to ponder his mistakes now, not with those two closeby.

"Are you not hungry?" Obi-Wan asks, shoving a plate with bread across the table. "Can't have your hard work going to waste."

"You're right" He picks up a pice, taking a bite absentmindedly.

"Are you still with us?" The younger man waves a hand in front of his face. "What are you thinking about?"

"Are you ill papa Qui?" Anakin throws in, looking up from his plate, jam spread across his cheeks. He wipes it away with his sleeve, leaving a red stain.

"Ani!" Obi-Wan frowns.

"What? Oh…" The boy fiddles with the sleeve. "Sorry." The other sighs."Who of us is going to do the laundry?"

Qui-Gon chuckles "Already in a nanny mood, aren't you?"

"No! That's not-urgh" He crosses his arms and leans back in his chair.

"I can help you Obi" Anakin jumps up, pulling off his tunic. "Can we go now?"

"Good idea Ani." Jinn grins and waves at his friend "I am certain Obi-Wan is eager to teach you"

"Great!" The boy grabs his hand, tugging him out of his chair. "Come on!"

As he is dragged out the door, Obi-Wan turns back, mouthing an 'I hate you' towards Qui-Gon, before they vanish around the corner.

Jinn shakes his head, smiling widely, and sets upon the tedious task of cleaning up the mess they left behind.


	10. Chapter 10

Summary: Qui-Gon is not sure whether he likes Obi-Wan's new beard. (The author does though.)

* * *

Obi Wan is sporting a full beard. Qui-Gon can't even tell when his young partner had started to let it grow until it was...just there. Granted, they had both been off planet in turns to fulfill some minor missions, but it surely hadn't feelt long enough for it to grow that much-or fast for that matter.

He isn't sure whether he likes it or not, as it has turned the young boy he knew into a grown man.

Even though nothing else has changed about Obi-Wan, he seems more mature, settled down, to some extent even more respectable. However, what remains are his kind blue eyes and the bright smile that lights up his face and with it Qui-Gon 's world.

He berates himself internally for these thoughts. They are against everything the Jedi code dictates them. But on the other hand, wasn't their relationship itself against the strict rules of their order? Qui-Gon cannot bring himself to care about it. If there is one thing he knows, it is that being with Obi-Wan balances him out and even makes him a better man. If compassion and genuine care aree not approved of by the council, he thinks it is pure hypocrisy.

Thus he keeps on watching Obi-Wan as they go about their everyday life.

Anakin seems to like his lover's facial hair all the more, constantly trying to get a hold of it and exclaiming what a fluffy bear 'daddy Obi' has become.

It is endearing to see them running about the hills or swimming in the nearby river, pretending to be training but ultimately just behaving like small children.

It is in these moments Qui-Gon feels at peace, even if he is aware that all good times eventually have to come to an end. Still he doesn't have the heart to tear them away from their peaceful life just yet.

Sometimes he will even join them, more often than not after the ccombined efforts of Ani and Obi-Wan, nagging him to 'get up and come over here already'.

It is one late afternoon, the sun still high up in the sky, though Ani had declared he was tired and wanted to sleep, that he brings up his thoughts.

"A beard? Why?" He lounges on their couch, Obi-Wans 's head safely nestled against his chest, and runs his fingers through the surprisingly soft hair, so unlike his own scruffy beard.

"Hm?" Obi-Wan looks up at him. "What about it" There is the unspoken question of 'Don't you like it?' as well, but he doesn't dare to say it aloud, though in truth he would be rather disappointed if the answer was indeed 'No'.

Qui-Gon shrugs, a motion he has grown rather familiar with ever since they started their living together with Anakin, hailing from the fact that arguing about things he doesn't like all the time will gain him nothing at all. So shrugging it is.

"Nothing?" Obi-Wan asks and raises an eyebrow.

"It's...unusual" Qui-Gon mumbles.

"Unusual?" The ginger sits up straight and fixes him with a curious glance. "As in a good kind of unusual or a bad one?"

"Well. I'm not certain?" It comes out more like a question than a statement.

"Oh" Obi-Wan lets his shoulders slump. "Do you want me to shave it off then?" And now there is the disappointment evident in his voice after all. Frankly, Obi-Wan had started it out as an experiment at first, but quickly grown accustomed and even fond of his new look. He thought it gave him a somewhat distinguished appearance.

"No! No, of course not" Jinn intervenes, seeing the other's face darkening ever so slightly.

"So I shall keep it then?"

"Yes! No! Maybe" Qui-Gon blurts out and flushes at his own indecisiveness. Truth be told, the longer he looks at his lover, the more appealing does the facial hair become. He ducks his head as his thoughts start to wander in less innocent directions.

"Are you quite alright master?" Obi-Wan reaches out a hand to brush his cheek "You feel hot." He frowns.

"It's nothing" the older man stutters "And don't call me master. Not here"

"As you wish, master" The younger one grins and plants a kiss on his cheek.

"Obi-Wan!" Jinn gasps and draws back.

"That's my name, yes" he laughs, which is answered with a groan.

"When did you become so cocky?" Qui-Gon shakes his head in exasperation.

"Newly found confidence. Don't you like that either?" It earns Obi-Wan a light smack to the back of his head.

"Don't be ridiculous"

"You're the one being ridiculous!" He protests and pouts for good measure.

The beard, Jinn notices, makes his friend's blue eyes and the little wrinkles around them whenever he laughs stand out even more. He stares, being at a loss for words.

Obi-Wan finally waves a hand in front of his eyes.

"Qui-Gon? Master!" The older man blinks, his cheeks taking on an even darker shade of red.

"Sorry I-" Why is it he has so many difficulties with simply expressing compliments or the way he feels? There are a thousand things he wants to say, but his tongue will form none of them. Instead he opts for a kiss, gentle at first, but quickly increasing in intensity.

The sensation between softness and roughness against his own jaw is both strange and pleasant, making his stomach flutter and heart rate speed up as he draws Obi-Wan into his lap, tightly winding his arms around the other's back.

"Now that's more to my liking" Obi-Wan mumbles against his lips between kisses, his own hands tangling in the long, greying hair.

"I take it you approve then?"

"Hmmm" Qui-Gon hums and traces his spine, counting the small bumps he can feel under the robes and skin. It sends goosebumps all over Obi-Wan 's body.

Boldly he makes to push Qui-Gon's robes aside to lavish his neck with some attention, but is stopped by the patter of bare feet outside their sitting room, soon followed by a blonde head peeking in through the door and ultimately resulting in Anakin launching an ambush hug at them, squeezing in between their bodies.

"I couldn't sleep! I need my papas with me." the boy exclaims in a mildly whiny tone and snuggles against Obi-Wan's chest, head tucked under his chin.

"I like your beard Obi! So fluffy." He sighs happily. Reaching back to blindly draw Qui-Gon's arm around him as well, he falls asleep within minutes, a content smile on his face. If both of them had learned anything over the short period of time with Anakin, it was that the boy never ceased to surprise them, whether it be with his brightness or the joy he took in the simplest comforts.

"Seems you will have to show me how much you like my new looks another time" Obi-Wan whispers and flashes Jinn a cheeky grin.

"Oh, be quiet" Qui-Gon hisses but smiles all the same.

After a few minutes of comfortable silence he adds: "there's always tomorrow."

Obi-Wan is glad his own blush is mostly hidden by the shadows cast by the setting sun outside.


End file.
